Author: Catherine Grant

I know you didn’t know anyone else there, but you didn’t have to spend the whole night hovering around me. Sorry. Transcendental meditation. Read more →

I think he might be my favorite mixed martial artist. The correct term is “multiracial”. I really expected more from you. Read more →

It’s a tragic story. Kassandra could see the future but could do nothing to prevent it. True. … Kabob too, I guess. Read more →

It’s not an actual lake of mead. You know that right? Yes. Thanks. I’m not an idiot. … You lied to me. Read more →

I haven’t seen it, but I gather from the title that “There Will Be Blood” is about homogenization of the gene pool. Maybe? Read more →

I’m getting a tungsten ring for his birthday. Yeah? Couldn’t you just get one to start? Isn’t that kinky enough? Read more →

Sure, Sheila Kelley is great… but my favorite pole dancer is still Vaslav Nijinsky. Read more →

I thought you said you couldn’t come out tonight because you were researching cloud platforms – but now I find you playing videogames. Shh! I’m about to beat Roy Koopa. Read more →

My psychiatrist called me “a work in progress” and said my failed relationships are “a product of mnemic neglect”. That’s ridiculous. You eat plenty of steak. Read more →

I guess it was alright. I didn’t like the endin’ though. I could have wrote a better endin’ then that. Truer words… Mmm-hmm. I think she just wishes you’d say truer words. Yup. … Read more →

Red Thursday. That’s a thing now. In every daily and flyer. … Next year, Tampax should promote that hashtag. Read more →

That movie sucked. Hard. I mean, it’s rife with historical inaccuracies. That’s your criticism of a poorly acted fantasy flick ‘bout witches, demons and exorcisms starrin’ Nicolas Cage? It would bother you more if you knew anything about Teutonic Knights. Go on. Tell me what you know about Teutonic Knights. Uh… I could drink one under the table. Read more →

You see this stuff with the CDC? Yeah. It’s pretty scary. In the end I ripped all mine to MP3 and chucked the works. Read more →

Do you think Tata Motors will go out of business one day? I’ve been practicing my overblown English accent. Read more →

What you playin’? … Cat… what you playin’? … Cat… I’m going to do unspeakable things to you. Horrible, vile things. … Silence implies consent. … … Huh? Read more →

What is she doing her thesis on? It’s some sort of study on diversity in chordates. Is that anything like placentophagy? The smoothies are good. … I hear. Read more →

If you could name yourself after any framework or programming lang— Bigwig! Falcon! Powerhouse! Cocoa Touch! Cocoa – Touch! Ah-huh-ah-huh-ah-huh-ah-huh-ah-huh… HyperTalk? Ah-huh-ah-huh-ah-huh-good-ah-huh-ah-huh-ah-huh-one-ah-huh… Read more →

It’s a pretty interesting paper. Are CAT bonds a form of insurance or a financial product? The holders make no promise to assume additional risk. The product is more freely transferable than insurance. What’s more, CATs can’t be bifurcated, which, they feel, further supports that they’re a financial instrument rather than insurance. What is she even saying? I don’t know.… Read more →

You have Under Armour stuff, right? Yup. Pretty happy with it too. My chainmail chafes way less now. Read more →

She’s such a lightweight that, if we’re going to a club, we don’t even invite her anymore. Just a couple of shots and she’s down. Mmm. … Some people just shouldn’t engage in gunplay. Read more →

I’m thinking about designing a special line of clothes for Lycans as I imagine it must be terribly irritating ruining your clothes every time there’s a full moon. Okay. You know that Lycans aren’t real, right? … I even have a name for the clothing line. “No Worse For Were”. Read more →